This was 12 seconds away from being another boring “bullet point” post.

Thankfully, Dodgers outfielder Milton Bradley was there to save the day. After a closed-door meeting he requested with his manager, Jim Tracy, Milton was back in fine form. It’s really awfully Mike Tyson-esque, when you think about it, so close to putting a coherent, logical thought together, and then BAM! out the door it goes. Although I haven’t seen the video, I wouldn’t be surprised if he went all Ron Artest on us, and broke out the new CD he needs to promote mid-stride.

A few quotes from the Associated Press write-up on the troublemaker troubled outfielder:

“I want people to say Milton Bradley was a pretty good ballplayer and a pretty good person,” Bradley said. “Anybody who is going to stand between me getting there, then they need to be eliminated.”

As I said… so close to making your point, then you’re eliminating people. C’mon Milt.

“Some people, that’s all their life is – is baseball … how many hits they get, how many runs they drive in, how many plays they make,” Bradley said. “They’re working for a plaque. I’m not working for a plaque. I’m working to put food on my table.”

Okay, okay… going the team player route, good sign, right? Nope! He’s gotta play the “starving ballplayer card”. Hey, MB, you’re making $2.5 mill this year, I think that’ll buy plenty of TV dinners. For a long time.

Finally, after breaking down to (at least) near tears, a reporter asked if he was OK…

Bradley replied, “I’m always OK. As long as I’m black, I’m fine.”

Huh?

No really. Huh?

As a black man, Milton, I think I have to agree. If you wake up something other than black, it’s time to see a doctor.