Okay, so sometime in the next 24 hours, I *promise* to bring you more about how Bill Simmons annoys me so much (yet keeps me coming back), what really happens when you mix the napkin game with 60 year old women, and how much fun it can be at a college football game before your school blows a 20 point halftime lead.
Until then, I leave you with my NFL picks for the week, already 2-0 and up a game on Pete thanks to Chicago out-sucking Dallas on Thursday, and within a game for the entire year, with the weekly record all tied up at 5-5-1 (with both of us sitting around a paltry 59% success rate).
Jacksonville at MINNESOTA – Randy Moss should be back, even if he’s only in for 3 plays, he’ll grab 3 TD’s and its lights out Jags.
San Diego at KANSAS CITY – KC deserves a break today. Actually every day. And its not so much that they deserve it, as the law of averages demands it at this point.
Tennessee at HOUSTON – Steve McNair’s injury status continues to be as easy to predict as the weather. And it’s gonna snow tomorrow. Or maybe its rain. Sunshine, anyone?
CLEVELAND at Cincinnati – Both teams suck, and I’m going to secure a Bengals win with this pick. I was dropped down the stairs as a child, and it continues to affect my Browns-related rationale. The 2003 version of this game featured another moment in “Where in this crowd of people is Tony?”
Tampa Bay at CAROLINA – Did you know that Pocatello, Idaho was voted the worst city flag in the country? Or at least 150th, the first round number they could find when they stopped caring.
Washington at PITTSBURGH – I promise this Steelers roll is going to end. Against a shitty team at home isn’t the time to stop any streaks.
PHILADELPHIA at NY Giants – Eli Manning is gonna have a rough welcome to the league. And that’s just from Kurt Warner’s wife. The Eagles will go a little easier on him.
New Orleans at ATLANTA – Huntington, WV has the 149th best flag. Rapid City, South Dakota was 148th.
Buffalo at SEATTLE – Koren Robinson is out for four games for smoking weed. If only he had settled for hooking up coke deals on his phone, he would have gotten two games.
(Unfortunately, I ran out of time at work, and I don’t think any of the following deserve witty commentary anyway.)
Miami at SAN FRANCISCO
NY JETS at Arizona
Baltimore at NEW ENGLAND
Oakland at DENVER
St. Louis at GREEN BAY
Random thought of the night: If Hillary Duff is headlining with Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey at the Rockefeller Center tree lighting ceremony (sometime soon on NBC), what has Vegas set as the odds that not only does Nick bang Hillary, but Jessica sticks with him afterwards? I’m thinking its a favorable 3-to-1, tops.