Okay, not exactly “steal” cable, but I remembered, once again a week late, that the week or so after the All-Star break is when Time Warner throws up their free preview of the MLB Extra Innings package. While my work (and drinking) schedule might not have allowed me to see any Rangers games anyway, I was a little less than happy to find out that even though they’re the only team playing an 8pm game tonight, they’re on neither ESPN or Extra Innings. Boo!
Why do I like shows like “Baseball Tonight”? Because in one 25 second highlight package, I had the following roller coaster of emotions:
“Ruben Sierra is still alive?”
“Ruben Sierra has 10 HR this year?”
“God I hate the Yankees.”
“Swinging for the centerfield scoreboard and coming up horribly empty? Ruben Sierra IS still alive!”
******
As of 6:22 PM, I’ve managed to hold off on picking up a copy of NCAA College Football 2005 for PS2. But my immune system is weakening, and I’m thinking if I can get some work done tonight, and with a weekend ahead of me, I might not make it to Wednesday.
One saving grace is that the closest place to pick up a copy is Target (I think), and I am living proof of the “Target Expenditure Acceleration Tangent” (or T.E.A.T., for short). Basically, if you stop in Target to buy an 89 cent loaf of bread, you’ll end up spending $15 after picking up Pop-Tarts, a 12 of Pepsi, and something else or five that you really don’t need, but pick up anyway. (Thanks to the allure of the Target snack aisle. Don’t believe me? Wander in and check out the deals!) If you want to stop in and pick up a DVD as a gift for a friend, that $15 DVD will wind up being close to $50 after you pick up a DVD for yourself, a trip to the snack aisle, and at least 3 things off of the shelves in between.
If you go in to buy a TV, you better get ready to sell a kidney.
So I look at it like this, I can somehow justify dropping in and picking up the college football game, afterall, I live alone, and the money spent on that game would have been spent in at least a week of golfing, eating and drinking. This way, I won’t leave my couch, will probably lose a few pounds from skipping meals, and I’m set. That and I have a $20 return I have to take in, so it will be like getting the game for half price. I’m golden, right? Nope. I’d certainly hit the snack aisle. Then remember that my PS2 controller is a little worn out, and I should probably start a new game with a fresh memory card, a new pack of boxers, some socks, and a trucker’s hat that says “I’m not fat, its just a shed for my tool”. And heaven forbid I run into the anniversary DVD of “Blazing Saddles”!
Someone hold me, I need an intervention.