Every once in awhile there is a great news day. I’m not talking about hurricanes and war and gas prices, I’m talking about the REALLY good stuff.

For instance:

Who knew that Art Garfunkel smokes pot? Next thing you’re going to tell me Joe Walsh might have tried acid once.

Possibly more unbelievably, Robert Traylor failed a physical? But he looked in such prime physical shape wheezing (halfway) down the court in Cleveland last year.

Next up, our friend Milton Bradley beats his wife? I always pictured him as a little kitten. What makes this not-so-funny story even funnier is the mental image of Milton storming away from the dinner table, complaining that his pork chops are dry, and heaving a bag of batting practice balls across the living room.

White Sox pitcher Mark Buehrle doesn’t only have a last name that’s among the most difficult to spell in all of baseball, but he’s also a bitch. Fortunately, manager Ozzie Guillen (who’s like Milton Bradley, without the impressive resume) basically told his ace to STFU and stop throwing meatballs. Good for Ozzie. The strategy worked in the White Sox favor, however, the Rangers were too busy pointing and laughing at Buehrle to remember they had to play a double header, losing 8-0 in the nightcap.

Finally, some hurricane talk. While it’s all very, very tragic (though apparently quite amusing to some), and I have to feel a bit for Brett Favre losing his family home, I can only imagine that ESPN’s Chris Connolly has gone through numerous tube socks waiting for the opportunity to drop an 8 minute story about it on NFL Primetime the first time the Packers show up on Monday Night Football this year.